Working like it's 1998

It's been about a week since we started to rebuild the dot-com dream in the biotechnology arena. Out first acquisitions in this dream were the Airzookas, and while amusing, are difficult to master as a truly effective office weapon. Due to the increasing frustrations of modern working life, it became quickly apparent that we needed a quick and easy method of releasing pent-up frustrations, in preference to the time-consuming and laborious task of aiming and shooting airzookas. When trying to emulate dot-com excesses of the past, you cannot go past the air-hockey table as a potent symbol of too much money and too little sense.

After passing a collection around for the paltry sum of $AU 15 each, we made the purchase of the table from another symbol of dot-com success, Ebay. Anticipation built up over the week before the table arrived, as we all eagerly awaited for our 5 foot bundle of joy to arrive from the importers in Melbourne. When the package finally arrived on the Wednesday of the next week, we quickly set to work building it. Despite the lack of adult supervision, we were able to construct the table and have it set up to play in record time. It was at this point of time that all productivity dropped in the office, and has yet to recover.

The table has a number of quirks about it - cheap construction, noise, and a lack of decent air flow being notable problems. These quirks, however, all pale in comparison to the problem of projectile pucks. It is common to see the pucks fly off the table due to certain people hitting them far too hard, and in fact numerous injuries have been sustained from these incidents. I apologise both in advance and in retrospect to anyone I've injured playing this.